Word Press Daily Prompt: Moved to Tears

Describe the last time you were moved to tears by something beautiful.

For those of you unfamiliar with WordPress, a prompt is given daily. Usually I ignore these, but this one really spoke to me. It has nothing to do with Taken in Hand or Domestic Discipline. It has to do with my daughter.

I have to admit, I am moved to tears quite frequently these days. At almost 13 years old, she has become such an amazing young lady. She is so smart, almost always makes good choices, has such a kind and sensitive heart, is independent and responsible, stays out of trouble, and it absolutely beautiful on the outside, as well.

Every time I see this beauty in her, it moves me to tears. I ask God, “How did I get so lucky for you to choose me to take care of this beautiful creature?” I stand in awe of my baby girl, sometimes unable to believe it.

The last time she brought me to tears was a few weeks ago when we were school shopping. She was trying on clothes and she just looked so grown up. Luckily, she is a modest dresser, so we never have that argument to deal with. But, she has such a fashion sense (she did NOT get that from me, I guarantee it!), she looked so beautiful in everything she chose, and just so grown up. How did she get from a beautiful newborn to an almost 13-year-old 7th grader? It went so fast. We have had our share of tribulations in her short life, including several moves, the divorce of her parents, and dealing with a mother who yells way too much (I’ve heard many moms feel this way). Still, she is absolutely amazing!

And, as much as I’d like to say that was the last time she brought me to tears, me writing this is also making me weepy. People like to give me and her father the credit, but it’s all her. She has become more than either of us could have dreamed. We are both very lucky to have her!

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Stepping up

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So, yesterday, Mr. Hand and I got into a text argument over his schedule and it not meeting my needs. I had been trying to be flexible, but the reality that I would only see him for a few hours every other week, was not something I was happy with. I have done this kind of relationship 3 times before, and it has always ended in my broken heart, when the man could not deliver on the promises he made, as far as the kind of relationship he wanted. It became very heated, and I tried to walk away from it, but somehow we managed getting back to it (my fault, mostly). I will take responsibility for my share of the argument, but Mr. Hand was also responsible. Finally, after threatening to leave me (this is a new relationship, remember), I asked him if we could just drop it until we had both calmed down and could actually talk in person rationally. Thankfully, he said yes. I was kind of disappointed that he wasn’t stepping up to his role to put a stop to it. I had been upfront about struggling to let go of things once I got started. Instead, he tried to run away from the relationship. This concerned me, more than the issue itself.

Later in the afternoon, I received a text from him. It said,

“I’ve been thinking. You need a spanking. For causing unneeded drama for both of us. You don’t trust me to make us work out.”

I responded with, “I don’t want to be spanked. I’m frustrated and disappointed and angry right now.”

I didn’t like it, I knew it would not be pleasant. But, I knew he was right. I was proud of him for finally stepping up. I’m sure it was hard for him to overcome his fear of getting hurt if the schedule couldn’t work out, to fulfill his role in this relationship. I picked a good man.

So, after he got home from his work shift, at 11 PM, I went over to his house to receive my punishment and talk. I got the leather paddle first, followed by the belt, which I have actually come to like. It can hurt worse at the moment, depending upon where it hits, but I recover quickly.

Afterward, we talked. We straightened out our expectations, the exact nature of his schedule, and I realized it’s probably not as bad as I thought. He had not communicated it to me in a way I could understand. I’m glad we had a chance to clear this up, instead of just calling it done and moving on.

We also got the chance to talk about some other concerns I had. I feel so much better that the air has been cleared. What started as a fight that could have ended our relationship ended up making it that much stronger. I’m really glad Mr. Hand did what he did. While I was not a happy camper at the time due to the fight and the fact that I had to get a spanking for my part of it, but he got away with nothing, it made me feel so much more secure in our relationship. He stepped up to be the man I need, which saved our relationship.

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Have I ever mentioned how awesome he is? Oh yeah, I have. But he’s worth saying it again. Mr. Hand, you are so incredibly awesome! I am very lucky to have you.