I’d like to think all of the adjectives in that title describe me. I’m very well-educated, very independent, run on the sane and normal, although a bit eccentric, side of things. I seem like your regular everyday person. I don’t drink, don’t smoke, rarely use bad language, dress fairly modestly, stay out of trouble, even my profession is fairly subdued. I’m pretty much boring as can be. So, why would this lifestyle appeal to me?
One word – Control. It’s about handing over control of a small aspect of my life to someone I can trust. Ever since I was a young kid, I’ve been responsible for myself, my mother, then my now ex-husband and children. I am in charge of a hundred people every single day at work. Now that I’m divorced, I am in charge of it all 24/7. I have always been in control of my relationships, whether I wanted it or not. I dreamed of a relationship where I wouldn’t wear the pants while my partner stood there naked, letting me make all the decisions. Might seem like a good deal, but it isn’t. I wanted a partner, someone to pull his weight, and for fear of sounding sexist, I wanted someone to step up and be the man, so that I could step up and be the woman.
Yes, I CAN do everything on my own. I have done it for a very long time. But, it’s exhausting. And lonely. And sometimes a little bit scary. Taken in Hand/Domestic Discipline is about knowing I can trust that someone has got my back, that when I lose control (and it happens), all is not lost. He is there to take over when needed, or to take charge to prevent the loss. It’s about having someone encourage me to be the best I can be, without it just being lip service.
I have given control to Mr. Hand from the very beginning. From day one, he has stepped up and taken on the role I desire. I am trying to tame my strong will a bit so I can be molded into the woman I so desire. He is so careful to “break me in” without breaking me. He understands the importance of making me understand his dominance without letting me lose sight of the strong woman that I am.
So, why do I do this? What’s in it for me? A very secure sense that this relationship is for real, that my man is here to stay, and that no matter what I do, I’ve got someone to provide me with loving, caring guidance, even if it sometimes means a sore bottom.